The Macalope loves the weeks conduce up to a new Apple mathematical product launch , when savant are almost literally crawling over each other like zombies climbing a wall to be the next to proclaim how its totally doomed . In their defense , it ’s a lot heavy to write this stuff with a square face after these devices ship .
Writing for theMotley Fool , Timothy Green declares“Apple ’s $ 10,000 Watch is stagnant on Arrival”(tip o ’ the antlers to@JonyIveParody )
Is it a terrible burden to be clairvoyant ? The Macalope ideate it must be .
Also whatever Green is . The Macalope does n’t know what it is but he imagine it must be really itchy .
The success of the cheaper versions of the spotter will ultimately count on how utile the gimmick is , as well as the cult - alike intensity level …
BZZZT .
… of Apple ’s marque .
Sales of the twist will depend on how useful it is . Way to go out on a ledge , Nostradamus .
Meanwhile , the very gamy - goal versions are unconvincing to move the needle for Apple , and could actually be an unmitigated disaster for the company .
Ah , now we ’re make with gas . Noxious , genius - electric cell cleanup gas .
Every Apple Watch , whether it cost $ 350 or $ 10,000 , cater the precise same functionality . The innards are very , and spending 30 times more than for the flash model gets the substance abuser on the dot zero add features .
precisely ! And can you ideate the hubbub if the $ 10,000 version had more feature ? “ APPLE ELITISM BLAZZROZZLEFLOZZLE CAPS LOCK ! ” rather we get “ APPLE ’S LUXURY WATCH IS STUPID . ” Aaaand we ’re also still getting “ APPLE ELITISM BLAZZROZZLEFLOZZLE CAPS LOCK ! ” because Apple is even sell a $ 10,000 watch .
So , you know , the heck with everything .
For the same grounds a $ 20,000 Rolex is n’t just a Timex with some fancy material fox in …
Is n’t it ? They both have the same features , do n’t they ? Time , date and … uh , just metre and particular date , actually . So , two . They both have two features .
For a luxury item to be a status symbolisation , there ca n’t be near monovular version that sell for prices that intimately anyone can afford .
That ’s probably news to Louis Vuitton and every other company that manufactures expensive helping hand cup of tea . Is it news program to Green that you could buy hand bags at Target ? Or that you may buy knock - off Louis Vuitton bags that function incisively the same as substantial Louis Vuitton bags ? Yes , some opulence cars will have in high spirits - end features that economy cars do n’t , but gasp are still knickers . Materials and build timbre not the same affair as functionality despite Green ’s attempt to conflate the two .
Look , Apple is n’t on the dot look Watch Edition tax income to replace iPhone revenue as a line of merchandise item on its financials . It ’s not even breaking all of Watch taxation out as its own item . But , please , keep trying to make up imaginary trouble .
Pundits are always coming down on Apple fans for being mindless zealots but at least we actually chew up the troupe for real problem alternatively of making up problems no one cares about .
Its smartwatch strategy makes little horse sense , and I think the ship’s company is suffering from a bit of hubris .
If you ’re joining us mid - dumb here , what we ’ve learned so far is that base on an unsourced rumor about how many Watch Editions Apple might be expecting to trade , the Edition is “ dead on arriver ” and possibly an “ unmitigated disaster ” and Apple is suffering from “ hubris ” .
A recent Wall Street Journal clause suggest Apple gestate to bring out over 1 million gold watches per month by the second quarter of this year .
No one has any idea whether that ’s rightful or not but let ’s just pretend it is because these tables are n’t go to thumb themselves .
Apple ’s high - conclusion gold watch are unlikely to generate enough tax income to have a meaningful wallop on the company ’s top line .
Hey , we agree ! You know what ? Apple probably accord , too , seeing how they specifically said the Edition would be available in circumscribed quantities and only in blue-ribbon computer storage . At the March 9th upshot , they demonstrate videos of the materials of the Sport and stainless Watch , but not the Edition . They just did n’t focus on it .
No matter what theWall Street Journalsays , it ’s pretty exculpated Apple does n’t await to betray that many Editions . This is why you should n’t free-base bombastic controversy on hearsay .
