This week?s journey of adventure in regretful Apple coverage take us from the exalted varlet ofThe New York TimesandThe Wall Street Journaldown to the gutter of Gizmodo , which lovingly open its virtual weapon to an furious screed byNewsweek?s Dan Lyons . Technology reporting is not pretty , dear lecturer .
Not that interesting
You?d imagine that if Steve Jobs called you ? a guck bucket ? for blab out out of school about his cancer that you might have the good taste to not make bold to have words on how Apple would be doing if Jobs were still alive .
Well , then you?re not Joe Nocera !
write forThe New York Times , Nocera asks?Has Apple peaked??(tip group O ? the antlers to pretty much everyone ) .
Wasn?t the Macalope just complaining about hoi polloi not doing the require meter reading ? Come on , New York Times ! We thought that time you don?t expend pose a comics section together was devoted to redaction and enquiry and being respectable ! Now we have no idea what you?re doing .
If Steve Jobs were still active , would the Modern single-valued function app on the iPhone 5 be such an unmitigated disaster ? Interesting question , isn?t it ?
No ! It?s not ! If only because it?s been asked by every Apple - hat hayseed who can string along two sentences together for the last 12 months . Steve Jobs?s death is just another in a continuing series of imaginary brass rings on the merry - go - cycle of Apple doom .
But more significantly , it?s an asinine enquiry .
As Apple?s chief executive , Jobs was a perfectionist . He had no permissiveness for corner - cutting off or mediocre products . The last time Apple issue a genuinely substandard product?MobileMe ?
Whoa , whoa , whoa , block right there .
MobileMe . Which was released under ? who ? Yeah , right . ? Steve Jobs never would have release a product as shoddy as this product released under Steve Jobs ! ?
No one read that at theTimesand think ? await a minute ? ? ? Arrgh .
No doubt , the iPhone 5 , which went on cut-rate sale on Friday , will be another collision .
Yes ! And the Maps outcome will evanesce with metre like Antennagate , Glassgate , HandicappedParkingSpotGate , and JobsWithAMustacheGate .
So , to answer your interrogative sentence again , no , this is not an interesting question .
Apple?s halo persist powerful . But there is nothing about it that is specially forward-looking .
unhappily , it has become a cliche to say one is type slowly so the slower students can empathise , but the Macalope hope Nocera will take the meter to read this next part slow and digest it . Apple reinvent the personal information processing system with the Mac , it reinvented the music player with the iPod , and it reinvented the electric cell phone with the iPhone . It did all that over the last 28 eld . To expect the company to do out with another intersection as background - breaking as those in the yr since Jobs died is just absurd .
you’re able to argue that the iPad should be include , but the Macalope doesn?t put it in quite the same pantheon of products . As pundits at the time of its acquittance were so fond of place out , ? It?s just a bragging iPod sense of touch . ?
In rolling out a new operating system for the iPhone 5 , Apple replaced Google?s represent software?the mapping gold standard?with its own , immensely inferior , software ?
Vastly inferior at some things?albeit very important things?and better at others .
? which has incense its customers . With single-valued function now such a decisive feature of smartphones , it seems to be an inexplicable misunderstanding .
If you obtain it incomprehensible then you?re either not paying attention or being willfully dense . Don?t know if you?ve noticed , but Apple and Google aren?t on the button on the in effect of full term these mean solar day . sit down to a negotiation over function datum right now would take someone with the patience of Job , something Jobs with an ? s ? for sure did not have .
And maybe that?s all it is?a err , soon to be bushel . But it is just as likely to turn out to be the canary in the coal mine .
Once again the Pundit Ouija Board is pressed into action ! Not surprisingly , the board has well - wear off grooves contribute to the ? APPLE DOOMED ! ? answer .
How long do you think it take to come up with a new maps app , from soup to nuts ? The Macalope doesn?t really know , but he wouldn?t be surprised to hear that it withdraw more than a year , particularly if you?re starting without any data . The point is , Jobs probably not only acknowledge they were going to do this , he was probably a proponent of it .
Apple?s current executive team is no doubt trying to maintain the same demanding , forward-looking culture , but it?s just not the same without the humankind himself reckon over everybody?s berm .
Uh , yeah , but the real trouble with the app as it stands isn?t so much the part that Apple build as it is the data . job may have been a very daunting comportment standing over your shoulder and easy strangling a kitten , or whatever pundits wish to fantasize about , but he could not magically make mapping data seem from thin air .
It?s interesting that Nocera doesn?t get at the one affair Jobsmighthave done better , which is selling it . But even Jobs couldn?t fool all of the people all of the time . ( See : Apple?s original?sweet solution?for iOS development . ) Still , as Jean - Louis Gassee observe , Apple should have done a good line on communicating that there would be job .
Now it is Apple?s turn to be king of the hill?and , not surprisingly , it has begin to act in a very similar style . you’re able to see it in the letters patent litigation against Samsung , a costly and counterproductive employment that has nothing to do with foundation and everything to do with protecting its turf .
Counterproductive ? ! In what wacky alternate timeline is squeeze your biggest smartphone competitor to hand over $ 3 billion and getting a ban on its products counterproductive ? Oh , you may say it?s a waste of time , you may say it?s beneath Apple , but counterproductive ? No .
? Oh my god , ? read one Twitter message I date . ? Apple single-valued function is the bad ever . It is like using MapQuest on a BlackBerry . ?
MapQuest and BlackBerry .
Exactly .
Uh - huh . Well , let?s not permit ? anonymous Twitter guy ? have the last word . Let?s letthis guy cable on Twitterhave the last discussion :
flow diagram :
Should I write an article about what Steve Jobs would have done ?
?
No .
A match made in heaven
OK , who got Dan Lyons in the Macalope?s Gizmodo ? ! Who got Gizmodo in the Macalope?s Dan Lyons ? ! Yes , it?s two horrible tastes that go dread together !
? Steve Jobs ? realism Distortion study Lives On ? ( GizmodoandDan Lyons ? Oh , you?d better trust there?s no link tothat , but bakshis group O ? the antler toAgentKyle ) .
Trite Apple meme in the newspaper headline ? Oh , you know it , girl .
The Macalope is disordered because he thought Lyons wrote forNewsweek . It seems he still does , harmonize to his bio on the piece , butNewsweekapparently won?t permit him bring out his personal blood feud notes , so he must turn to Gizmodo?and perhaps theWeekly World News?to lash out at his critic , of whom MG Siegler and John Gruber are just two .
The principle of thumb for following Apple is that if you need to know what Apple PR?s official argumentation is , you just require to read the top - tier Apple apologists like John Gruber and MG Siegler .
And if you ever want to know how to get a position exactly backwards , show low - grade ballyhoo artist tag like Gizmodo , now with more no - tier writers like First Council of Lyons !
They?re jolly much operating as recreational Apple spokesbots .
Unpaid ? ! Has Lyons seen how much Gruber reportedly makes ?
orchard apple tree brief these Guy , but alternatively of having the lump to do it on the record ?
Stop the means the technology diligence work , Dan Lyons want to get off !
If we could Dan , we would have sex to so we could be disembarrass of you .
? Apple feeds them some spin with the consideration that they will write it up while attributing their info to ? sources who are familiar with the situation . ?
As controvert to the other publication that got selective information from Google ? sources who are intimate with the place and vewy , vewy sad about how mean Apple?s being [ pouty face ] , ? who are impeccably indifferent .
Both break to talk about the suckiness of the maps app itself and alternatively spin the report to one about timing .
There?s no spin here . Both Gruber and Siegler have admit that the data stinks ; they?re answering the question of why Apple would use it . This offends the tender sensibilities of the artist formerly known as Fake Steve , because the only rational reaction is for us to all lose our smelly - word - for - composure because the data on one app on Apple?s latest peregrine operating system isn?t precise in many example . Someone needs to be salientian - marched out of One Infinite Loop !
And , of trend , in this version of outcome , Apple is doing the correct thing . And , of course , the villain is Google .
Lyons pulls no quotes from Siegler or Gruber and offers no refutation of points either have made . Second Council of Lyons just says ? Ofcoursethey come down on Apple?s side because they?re in Apple?s pocket . ? Ipso facto ergo sum allakazam ! They?re shamefaced .
Here?s an actual quote fromGruber :
Apple wanted turn - by - turn and transmitter single-valued function tile . Google wanted more control over the Maps app , more branding , and more identifiable location data . So Apple moved .
obviously , set out what was a business decision by both Apple and Google is shilling in Lyons?s book .
lease the Macalope be vindicated ( again ): Bad on Apple for shipping an app with crappy data . Discussing the very real line of work rationality why the company did so , however , does not make someone a shill .
It?s called misdirection , and it?s mostly used by sorcerer and Puerto Rico the great unwashed .
Yes ! Understanding why things go on is mismanagement ! Don?t try on to sympathize things , just brow - beat Apple !
See , this is how it work . When you?re foisting a turd off on your customers , you don?t call it a crap . You cover it with shiny glinting fake jewels and call it a tiara .
Lyon is shocked?SHOCKED!?to find there is selling going on here ! It?s a good thing Google would never do anything like that ! Like , say , fake an destination in an advert to make Apple?s map information look worse than it is .
Fortunately Apple still has shill who will hold urine for them .
The disturbed thing is ( as if there is just one crazy matter in this piece),Gruber harmonise with him :
Under - promise , over - deliver . Apple usually does a sound line at that , but I agree with [ Jean - Louis ] Gassee : they did not set expectations properly for the new Maps app .
SHILL .
For what it?s worth , there?s still no word from Gruber and Siegler on how they never observe any problems with maps when they were writing their original reviews .
It?s completely easy to not notice any problem , peculiarly after only a week of use . The Macalope?s been using iOS 6 for more than a week and he?s not seen any . Meanwhile , he can detail any number of times he got lousy directions from Google?s map datum ? because he used it for five years and in a variety of locations .
lamentably , the Venn diagram circles of ? sensible expectation ? and ? Dan Lyons screed ? do not intersect .
Steve is deadened , but the reality distortion field lives on .
And Fake Steve is dead , but the self - crucial drama female monarch lives on .
Saturday Special: There?s never anything good on
lease us rick now to the hallowed pages ofThe Wall Street Journalto get off from all this ? Steve Jobs would never ? ? hooey and alternatively expect at some other stuff .
Holman W. Jenkins , Jr. says that?TV Will Be Apple?s Undoing?(tip o ? the antler toThe Loopwith a foul language warning ) .
Apple had snafu under Steve Jobs?antenna - gate , MobileMe , the frequently obtuse Siri .
Yay ! at long last someone?s not desperately shove things under the couch cushions for make an wrong , well-worn point about things that ? never would have happened under Steve Jobs . ?
However much it might benefit Apple?s concern example to squeeze users to frequent its own maps app , the company won?t get far in trying to deny them Google?s far superscript app .
Again , though , the conflation of ? data ? with ? app . ? The current Mapsappis quite nice . Thedatastinks . When Google draw around to shipping its own app , what you?ll get is the opposite : great datum with a crappy app .
Yay , alternative !
Apple is bilk because there is no solution to video that will let Apple keep doing what it has been doing .
Well , thereisa solution , it?s just a question of when the studios will see that .
Apple?s fans imagine the company can do for TV what it did for music : breaking up the existing statistical distribution model . draw a blank about it .
Jenkins does not exactly say why the two are so different . They just are . And you Apple fan are dumb to want thing . And Apple?s dense to strain to do them . The end .
Video - content owners aren?t looking for a Jesus Christ and at last won?t be satisfied with anything less than an undetermined ecosystem accessible by any twist .
Uh , no . Actually , what they?re interested in is making you watch out ads or take a leak you pay for crappy message by roll up lousy shows together with expert show . In poor , they?re interested in foisting a sub - par user experience on their ? consumers ? because their ideal of how this should work is best exemplified by that eyeball scene inA Clockwork Orange .
God forbid someone attempt to fix the situation .
Apple?s rejection of Google?s superior maps is an obvious example , but it goes with the turf . Apple?s spectacular achiever with devices by nature led to the temptation of a meshwork - essence imperium . To such empires , maps are just too crucial as a way to gather information about users and hit them with ads and e - commerce chance .
This is so backwards it?s hard to know how to unpack it . One of the major reasons Apple and Google failed to come to an correspondence on keep on to license map information was because Google require more user datum and Apple didn?t want to supply it .
This piece read like Jenkins consume about 19 different columns about Apple , jumped up and down for a number and then threw them back up on the varlet . He?s forced to recognise that Apple has a strong allegiance to open access to the vane so he play it off as something that?s happening at a team story and doesn?t really have the bread and butter of upper management .
Right , because Apple?s so decentralised .
The clock time to worry will be if Apple?s quixotic pursuit for TV leads it to block more naturalistic solutions that come forth on the heart-to-heart Internet . When Apple admits defeat about television set , that may be the dear sign for the company?s hereafter .
Apple already allow content providers to make their own apps for Io and has partnered with some to make them for the Apple TV . Except for specific content like sport , it?s a crappier solution than get at everything centrally from iTunes , but it?s there , so the Macalope really has no idea what Jenkins?s complaint is about . Apparently Apple hear to improve the user experience is a adult error , and the fellowship should just roll over and let content provider retain to get it on everything up .
Well , isn?t not trying new things what made this commonwealth great ?
