The English language is not a fixed structure . surely over meter the meanings of words and their use can change . We ’re still not to the breaker point , however , where this is fine .
Writing forMarie Claire , Ciara Sheppard explains“Why we ’re a little pissed off about the raw iPhone 7 plan . ”(Tip o ’ the antler to SamT. )
Plans ? design have been released ? Now , the Macalope does not have time to readeveryarticle about Apple , but he ’s pretty sure if the company had released “ iPhone 7 plans ” he would have pick up about it .
No , what you mean isrumors . You ’re “ pissed off ” about rumour .
Kind of makes it fathom a small silly now , does n’t it .
Well , hang on . material ’s about to get sillier .
We ’re not too pleased about the blueprint for the new iPhone 7 …
blueprint , even . Who knewMarie Clairehad mole inside Apple ?
care , Apple certificate . Look for statuesque models dressed in the up-to-the-minute fashion from Milan hiding behind potted plant .
No one suspect the statuesque model dress in the latest fashions from Milan .
( Is Milan really a place where fashions come from ? The Macalope really has no idea . He ’s had this same suit perpetually . )
… which plan to get free of our darling home clitoris . Why ’d you go and do that , Apple ?
They have not , in fact , gone and done anything , inasmuch as the iPhone 7 has not been released yet .
Now , of class , when it ’s resign in the fall , itmightnot have a home clitoris or a headphone seaman or ascreenor even physical frame . ( “ The iPhone 7 is the first phone that ’s aconcept , and we suppose you ’re going to love it . ” ) But right now , we simply do not know . Thus is the linear nature of time in the universe in which we subsist .
The applied science behemoth are also planning on ousting the headphone jack in favor of wireless listening .
This is all getting a act much for us .
If your slip of the vapor last more than four hr , please seek medical attention . Or just get a grip already . The thing is , there could be many very existent benefit to having an iPhone without a family button , benefits that the rumors do n’t report . But , please , go nous and wear out your fainting couch over some rumors .
The guys over at Forbes have made a prediction on how the new and improved dwelling house button will work …
The lever will depress the wangdoodler and a organization of pulley will initiate a … well , it ’s really just a tiny Rube - Goldberg motorcar that culminates in a little bowling chunk knocking data into a memory registry . That ’s just our speculation free-base on some sciencey material we read in a tract .
really , this says “ Scientology ” . Still … science .
If it ai n’t broke , do n’t fix it , we say .
We believe we are cite both Edison and Tesla when we say “ Leave well enough alone ! ” Do n’t tamper with dark forces you do n’t see ! If the Wind God had wanted us to live outside this cave , why would he make it so darned windy out there ? !
Here ’s just a few reasons why we know the plate clit :
– It ’s [ sic ] politic aerofoil and thin indent pleases us greatly .
Wow . Oookay , rather than detailMarie Claire ’s inclination of reasons progress is literally ruining everything , the Macalope is just going to quietly impress this article out so he can put it through the shredder and then guide you instead toa piece by Mark Hibben atSeeking Alphaon why it ’s premature to take iPhone 7 rumour at case time value .
Although , it ’s kind of in the name “ hearsay ” , innit ?
